butterbuns: (¤Friends¤ Prison Bitches)
How do you introduce yourself to people, when you don't even know who you are? I guess that's the question I'm really still trying to figure out. Well, both who I am, and who I am to other people. Even a little while ago, I probably would have known how to answer this topic. But so much has changed in such a short amount of time, and I've realized so many things about myself, that I'm at somewhat of a loss. And no, I'm not going to explain everything in my life now, if you want to know, I guess you'll have to keep voting for me ;) I also hate online introductions, because they feel so rushed and forced. If we were meeting in real life, most of these things wouldn't come up for weeks, if not for months.

So I guess I'll just go with the basics for now, and see what happens.

*I'm Saskia, I'm 20, and I live on Ontario, Canada with two roommates, both of whom I went to college with.

*I'm an unemployed college drop-out. I started taking Journalism when I went to college at 17, hated it, and switched into a General Arts program, which I just got more and more dejected about when I realized that the only thing it led to was going to be more school, and I still had no idea what I wanted to do. So I slacked pretty badly, "finished" in April, and now I have no clue what I want to do with the rest of my life. Or even the next month.

*I'm totally self-conscious, especially about my body. Mostly because I don't know many people in RL with the same sort of body type as I have. All my friends that are aprox my height are either complete sticks, or have meat on their bones. I used to be a total stick in high school, and now I'm 6' tall, and "average" weight, and it makes clothes fit really strange on me, because it seems everything's made for either sticks or bigger girls. I hate it.

*I watch a lot of TV, and tend to ramble a lot of someone makes the mistake of asking me about a show I watch. Which usually ends with me feeling like a bit of a dolt, but I love TV and movies. It's the one thing I've always been passionate about. So when people get me started, I have trouble stopping.

*I quit smoking in August/September because I got an ulcer and oh god did it hurt to smoke. Although I will say I'm lucky. I had no withdrawal symptoms, which was nice. I will say though, when I get really stressed or upset I still want one, but I feel it's more out of habit than the addiction.

*I'm a fan of body modification. I'm in the process of stretching my ears, they're currently at 4g and being pains in my ass. I have a tattoo on my shoulder for my grandmother, and a tattoo on my wrist that says "fragile but strong enough" from Megan McCauley's song Fragile. I want to get *something* on my hip, but I don't know what. I also want to get the Seal of Rassilon somewhere, but I haven't figured out where it would look best.

*I miss dying my hair all sorts of wacky colours.

*I try and be PC and sometimes I fail horribly. God knows I've ended up on [livejournal.com profile] sf_drama a time or two for saying something stupid. But I try. And I'm learning. But when and where I grew up, no one ever got called out for saying sexist things, or racist things, or even transphobic things. And I wish when I'd started saying things like "That's so gay" that someone had slapped some sense into me, because I feel terrible about it now, even though I was as young as I was, and just didn't know better. So if I say something, and you've taken offense to it, please let me know, preferably politely.

*I play WoW, and I'm trying desperately to level to 80 on my main character before the xpac comes out in December. I only started in August, so it's been an interesting journey.

*I've become a lot more shy in person in the last few years and I find it really hard to make new friends, or even just to hang out with more than one or two of my friends at a time. It's starting to bleed over into my online life, which is unfortunate, because it leaves me not commenting on a lot of entries for fear of sounding stupid and having people just think I'm an idiot.

*I have serious issues with people blowing me off and ignoring me. As well as lying to me. And cheating on SOs. These are hot button topics with me, and I tend to lecture, particularly about the last one. I have very little respect for cheaters, or the person they're cheating WITH. (Which makes watching Single Father really awks for me. That storyline needs to be over. Soon.)

*I participated in Idol last year, and failed epically. I ended up getting eliminated due to missing the deadline for an entry. I don't want to go out like that this year, because that was just shameful.

*I'm seriously considering attempting NaNoWriMo again this year (for the 5th time), but given that I have no plot ideas, that's probably not going to happen. I would love to be a published writer, but I don't have the discipline to sit and write and plot and figure things out. That's why I used to do online RPing, which to be honest I quite miss.

*This season I'm hoping to do sort of mixed entries, with text and photography, but that all hinges on my being able to find the battery charger for my good camera. Or my digital camera itself, as it seems to have grown legs and run off. Maybe I'll do the occasional youtube rant instead.

So in closing, have some pictures! Some taken BY me, some just OF me.

Wee Me!

Getting piss hammed in March and bounding around on our lawn.

Halloween last year with my friend Ang.

The contents of mine and [livejournal.com profile] ultrasexified's fridge at one point in college.

My first tattoo

And DA has refused to load for me all day, so...that's about it.

Date: 2010-10-28 05:36 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] majesticarky.livejournal.com
Nice pics! I'm really tall too and know how it's like finding clothes that fit... but you are actually taller than me and you look great!

Date: 2010-10-28 05:39 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] butterbuns.livejournal.com
Haha, the worst part right now about finding clothes that fit, is when you finally find something perfect, and then your weight changes. Happened to me this summer because of the ulcer when I was barely eating, and lost like 30 lbs (some of which I've put back on) and my jeans (WITH a belt) were literally falling off. >.< They kind of still are a little.

Date: 2010-10-28 11:55 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] fortitudehigh.livejournal.com
Online roleplaying is great when you just want to write without having to worry about everything else, which is why I sometimes miss it myself, even though I haven't done it in years now.

Date: 2010-10-29 01:49 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] butterbuns.livejournal.com
Yeah, it's been quite some time since I have either, but I sort of swore it off, because every time I settled into a game, something in RL happened and I totally flaked.

Well howdy, fellow Idolist

Date: 2010-10-28 03:46 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] wyliekat.livejournal.com
and Canuck (and WoW player)!

Re: Well howdy, fellow Idolist

Date: 2010-10-29 01:48 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] butterbuns.livejournal.com
Oy to the vey, so many things in common!

Re: Well howdy, fellow Idolist

Date: 2010-10-29 01:26 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] wyliekat.livejournal.com

Date: 2010-10-28 07:48 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] teenagewitch.livejournal.com
I have ended up on SFD as well once. I also am trying to get my character on wow up to 80 but I keep getting distracted. I started in July so I feel your pain!!

Date: 2010-10-29 01:00 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] lawchicky.livejournal.com
Nice tattoo! I always waffle as to whether I want one.

Date: 2010-10-29 01:48 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] butterbuns.livejournal.com
Just go for it. Tattoos are ♥

Date: 2010-10-29 01:45 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] alphaloria.livejournal.com
I have been craving a new tattoo for awhile now.

No missing deadlines this time, ok? I want to see what else you have to say :)

Date: 2010-10-29 01:47 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] butterbuns.livejournal.com
Me too. It's been 2 years since my last one.

Haha, yes, no more leaving entries till 5 minutes before they're due and then freaking because the internet's dead. XD

Date: 2010-10-29 02:45 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] jenandbronze.livejournal.com
I don't remember you last year, but I hope this time you will go further through Idol. I look forward to reading more entries from you.

Even though I dropped out of high school and graduated college, the path for me isn't where I am headed, but I am slowly finding where I should be, somewhat.

Congrats on the no smoking! Not an easy thing to do!

Date: 2010-10-30 09:22 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] butterbuns.livejournal.com
You probably wouldn't, I was actually out pretty damn early.

Yeah, I wanted to take a year OFF after high school, got told no way in hell, so I had to go to college, and it made me really resent being there and it was just a ball of bad.

Haha thanks! Though I'll be honest, it has been pretty easy. I put down my pack and was like 'no more' and haven't touched one since, and I live with smokers.

Date: 2010-10-30 12:43 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] antianhedonia.livejournal.com
I feel the same way about intros. Hello and good luck!

Date: 2010-10-30 04:46 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] gaea-rising.livejournal.com
Nicely done. :)

Good luck!

Date: 2010-10-30 06:16 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] horosha.livejournal.com
Something tells me I'm going to go out of Idol the same way this year (my first time). I'm very glad there are two byes--I'll be using 'em!

Date: 2010-10-30 09:20 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] butterbuns.livejournal.com
Haha, we had byes last year too. I just used to spend all week "thinking about what I wanted to write" aka procrastinating, and then it would be an hour before they were due and I had to bang something out. That last week my internet died while I was writing the post. It came back about 20 minutes after the deadline.

Oops. >.

Date: 2010-10-31 03:45 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] trollied-dollie.livejournal.com
I really liked the feel of this.

Date: 2010-10-31 04:51 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] imafarmgirl.livejournal.com
Welcome back to idol. I totally agree with your first paragraph regarding introductions.

Date: 2010-10-31 08:06 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] sketchybrunette.livejournal.com
And I wish when I'd started saying things like "That's so gay" that someone had slapped some sense into me, because I feel terrible about it now, even though I was as young as I was, and just didn't know better. So if I say something, and you've taken offense to it, please let me know, preferably politely.

This is really admirable. It's not easy to try to check yourself on these things, and it's even more difficult to ask other people to call you out on it (that can sometimes be not pretty). I tend to call people out (a lot of times about ableist things because they often don't think about it at all) but I try to give folks the benefit of the doubt and be polite about it (until, you know, someone is a total asshole, haha).

Anyway, that's cool of you. Nice to meet you! Good luck!

Date: 2010-10-31 10:03 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] basric.livejournal.com
Lovely pictures. Adorable child. Look forward to reading your entries. Good Luck.

Date: 2010-11-01 12:36 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] kutiechick.livejournal.com
I watch a lot of tv, too - what sorts of shows?

Hope this season works out better for you! :)

Date: 2010-11-01 10:08 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] butterbuns.livejournal.com
Look at your TV guide. Then look at me. Then look at your TV guide. Then look at me. XD

Pretty much I watch anything at least once. If I sat here and listed shows, I'd be here for days. Like, I watch so many shows that usually I have to find 3-4 online every day because I didn't have time the night before to watch them.

Yes, I'm crazy.

Date: 2010-11-01 04:10 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] pixie117.livejournal.com
Cheaters piss me off too. So freaking much, I just can't stand it either. And people that are with obvious cheaters? Yeah, I don't have much respect for them either really.

Nice to meet you :)

Date: 2010-11-01 09:23 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] littleninjachic.livejournal.com
I've been "playing" WoW for 2 years and my main character is only lvl 42, LOL!! I can never find the time to actually play it! Are you at least close to achieving your goal?

Date: 2010-11-01 10:06 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] butterbuns.livejournal.com
Well, I hit level 47 today, so...sort of close? XD I haven't been playing a whole lot lately because after patch 4.0.1 hit...I was being disconnected every 10 minutes for a week. It sucked. Add in family drama and roommate drama and I haven't felt much like dealing with all the new stuff in the game. Before that I was doing pretty much a level a day. So I should be able to make it. I hope.

tl;dr Level 47, pretty close, should make it.

Date: 2010-11-02 02:07 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] joeymichaels.livejournal.com
So much depends on having a battery charger in our brave new century.


(and welcome back!)

Date: 2010-11-02 04:48 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] java-fiend.livejournal.com
Great intro and great pics! Looking forward to seeing what you churn out this season. Good luck to you! And I don't think being PC is always what it's cracked up to be. ;-)

Date: 2010-11-02 03:00 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] mstrobel.livejournal.com
Whee! I'm trying to get to 80 as well - I only started playing in... like... gosh, I can't remember, but I think about July or August as well? My girlfriend is a gamer and after a few months of living with her and not joining in, we decided to see how I went with my own character, to see if I liked the game. Heh. I made level 70 yesterday, and finished exploring the entire world today so now I have a pretty tabard and the Explorer title!

And yep, I'm totally a gamer nerd myself too now, LOL.

Date: 2010-11-02 04:15 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] amazingwriter23.livejournal.com
Nice to meet you and good luck! AW

Date: 2010-11-02 04:45 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] attheonesix.livejournal.com
<*I've become a lot more shy in person in the last few years and I find it really hard to make new friends, or even just to hang out with more than one or two of my friends at a time. It's starting to bleed over into my online life, which is unfortunate, because it leaves me not commenting on a lot of entries for fear of sounding stupid and having people just think I'm an idiot.>

This resonated with me in a big way, because I'm kind of in the same boat now. Either way, here's to both of us coming out of our shells for Idol? Good luck!


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